Trauma is a topic we might encounter on social media or as a plot point in a movie. However, it deserves far more attention and respect. Some 70 percent of Americans will experience at least one traumatic event during their lifetime. A single event could be enough to result in post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). But what happens when it’s more than one event? What do survivors deal with when the trauma is ongoing?
Complex trauma occurs during incidences of chronic abuse, danger, and more. It can bring out complex post-traumatic stress disorder (C-PTSD) — a daunting, often misunderstood condition. This is where internal family systems therapy (IFS) can be the best possible option.
IFS: Some Basics
Each of us has a foundational deeper Self. It’s the head of our “internal family” and ideally, we are guided by its inherent wisdom. A Self-guided person can navigate the plethora of emotions we experience each day — without being overwhelmed. But sometimes, our Self gets drowned out by our sub-personalities.
These parts typically include:
- Managers: Their goal is to impose order but their tactics can be less than ideal
- Firefighters: All they can do is temporarily put out emotional “fires” while leaving the root causes unaddressed
- Exiles: These parts jump into action to suppress negative feelings and memories but again, we need much more than this to heal properly
It’s not that these parts — or any parts — are “bad.” Rather, they are meant to be accessories, not leaders. When complex trauma throws off the balance and supersedes the strength of your Self, IFS therapy is there to help you recalibrate a healthier balance.
The Struggle of C-PTSD
The impact of repetitive trauma can be nuanced and tricky to fully identify. If someone, say, grows up in a household in which domestic abuse is present, such dysfunction can become normalized in their minds. They develop unhealthy coping mechanisms to survive. Afterward, it requires a particular type of exploration to begin the recovery process. IFS is uniquely positioned to perform such work.
The Benefits of IFS for C-PTSD Recovery
A survivor of complex trauma might, for example, struggle with self-esteem issues. They may display tendencies like:
- A critical inner monologue
- Negative self-talk
- Self-blame
- An inability to set healthy boundaries
- Perfectionism
- People pleasing
- Imposter syndrome
What might be happening is:
- Your manager needs an explanation for the abuse you faced so they choose the easiest target: yourself.
- The firefighters rush in to calm out-of-control emotions by giving them one focus: yourself.
- Exiles take on the task of preventing you from lashing out at others when things can be simplified by aiming that blame at yourself.
What IFS Can Do
Your IFS therapist shifts your focus to your inner Self because that is where the answers lie. You learn to recognize the good intentions of sub-personalities but begin to reduce the influence they are wielding. Since IFS is also a somatic therapy, you will also find relief from the bodily sensations caused by relentless trauma in your life.
When you can suddenly see that our internal family is out of sync, it becomes more clear that you need to reset the balance of power. Just as you wouldn’t let a child run your external family, IFS teaches us that we must draw from our truest source of power: the Self. From there, you can live with the self-compassion you need to process and resolve the months, years, or even decades of complex trauma.
How You Can Learn More
The “family” model may, at first, seem confusing. That’s why I invite you to reach out. Allow me to tell you more about how IFS therapy can help you thrive again.